(P)erspectives Of Change
Here we go again… CHANGE. Some of us embrace it. Others, loath it. Even the written word can generate these feelings. Such as “Make Different:, “Replace”, “Shift”, “Exchange”, “Transform”, “Modify”, “Alter”, “Vary”, “Switch”, “and Transfer”. Each word generates a unique personal comfort level based on past experience. We must learn to manage through the path of change so most of these words generate a consistent comfort level.
#1 Stay Focused On The Final Outcome
- Acknowledge the situation for the facts. Try hard not to manufacture interpretations of what could or should be. Stay on point and take “getting personal” out of even “personal situations”. This requires you to remove your view to a 30,000 foot level.
- Define how it affects your ultimate goal. Changing times require a look at your target also known as your goal. How does this change effect where I want to go, the resources I need to get there and my ultimate time table.
- Slow down to find a workable solution. Life is not a race. It’s a process. The same goes for your career, relationships and even health. Start brain dumping.
#2 Be Proactive
- Realize you have limited knowledge when it comes to some changes.
- Seek the perspective of others to encourage creative solution. We don’t know it all and are not expected to. People love to create and design solutions especially when it’s not involving them directly in the issue. Who can you bounce off an idea or potential solution to?
- Broaden your “advisory council” by finding people who have been in similar situations. Others have had similar experiences that can be tapped into. In addition, others have resources they can put you in touch with.
#3 Prepare For Confusion
- Realize you cannot plan for every contingency. Be flexible to put aside any feelings of failure to work through the issue.
- Stay positive and put away emotions. It doesn’t help the situation to cry, whine, shout, or get angry. In a nutshell, a positive outlook will enlist a host of creative solutions. A negative outlook locks down your creativity and results.
- Look long term beyond the challenge. A bad day does not mean your having a bad life. So, a bump in road or change in direction doesn’t mean you will not obtain your long term goal or effort.
#4 Be Courageously Creative
- Brainstorm all ideas and pathways. Bits and pieces make up one or more workable solutions. Brain dump.
- You don’t need steps 1-100 to begin. You don’t need all the steps defines and in place to take the first step. A lot of times, the first step leads to the next 10. Humans don’t come with a crystal ball to see the correct path or step. So be courageous.
- Update your strategy as you move along a new direction. Be flexible to change paths always keeping in mind your long term reward. Integrate new ideas or resources for creative solutions.
- Involve others in the process. To go it alone is to own all the responsibility for the success and failure. Involves others to help forge new pathways and share in your success.
- Stay motivated by knowing that tackling change provides you with enormous life values. You benefit by tackling new demons and have the experience to help others through the same or similar process.
Final Steps
Continually share your knowledge and experiences so you and others can grow personally and professionally. Change is a great teacher for the present and future. Use him wisely.
August 11th, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, change, intellectual, occupational | | 0 Comments
(O)pportunities: Destination Unknown
Each of us carries our own personal definition of opportunity based on past experience. To some, the definition may be centered on growth while others may view opportunity as a means of fear and resistance to change.
August 11th, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, Uncategorized, attitude, change, emotional, habits | | 2 Comments
(N)ever Giving Up
Seasons of the year. Some we love, some we wish away and some we embrace with a “get through it” attitude. The seasons of life can be compared to the changing seasons of the year. We enter into birth (spring) with growth and pushing through the challenges. Then onto being a child (summer) with fun and exploration. Next, is adulthood (fall), with the changing colors of careers, perspectives’ and continual daily activity. Finally, winter (retirement), where we settle down but not necessarily settle in and embrace and participate in the new seasons of those around us.
What about the seasons of our daily lives? From job loss to finding another job that’s a better fit for our talent, losing a coveted project to gaining a promotion, losing weight to gaining strength and flexibility and losing a battle in the workplace to gain respect and credibility in how we handled it.
No matter where we are, embracing the season is key to finding opportunity and leaving your mark on the past. Understand that what appears to be negative can really be a defining moment to change into the next season with positive expectation and exploration. Watching nature change through the seasons gives us a plan on how to adjust to our own. Nature gently embraces it’s future letting go of the past. For example, fall leaves turn from green to an extraordinary display of color as it gently moves into colder weather. We too can gently embrace our daily change with a color of positive expectation and exploration. Make this your season of doing the unexpected and embrace the season with a attitude of growth and opportunity.
August 6th, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, attitude, emotional, intellectual, productivity | | 0 Comments
(M)otivation: Cure or Curse
All of us have either set a goal or seen a speaker that has inspired us to change behavior or reach new levels. We begin the new journey with positive thoughts and actions along with a vision of what it will look like on the other end. Some of us get stimulated to work through the challenges. While others defuse or deflate when life places a boulder in our road to success.
Motivation can be a cure if we are willing to layout a plan and commit to win regardless of what it takes to reap the rewards. For example, a marathon runner doesn’t show up on race day and begin the 26.2 mile run. They prepare for at least six months with a consistent plan of action. During that time, there are challenges in the form of weather, potential injury, tiredness, and time constraints. By placing their foot on the track at race day, they’ve already reached the finish line due to their motivation to stick it out and see it through.
On the other hand, motivation can be a curse if we have set high expectations with an inappropriate time frame. For example, we start training for the marathon two months prior to race day. We also risk lowering our self esteem and the “stick to it” glue to reach lofty goals and self transformation.
Use motivation as a tool to help stay the course realizing there is no magic pill for success. Motivation is ultimately INTERNAL, meaning we are the drivers for success. Motivation that’s EXTERNAL, as in other peoples needs and wishes, has a high probability for failure. Choose your correct motivation and reach for the stars.
August 3rd, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, attitude, emotional, habits, intellectual, performance, productivity | | 0 Comments
(L)eadership - Negotiating The Slippery Slope
We all know people who positively lead others and get things done. They seem to have been born with the ability to take people to a place of empowerment and help them them reach their goals. Most of them possess the same characteristics:
- have a positive attitude
- forward thinking vision
- ask questions
- look at the big picture
- discover and use other peoples strengths and talents
- negotiate conflict well most of the time
It looks simple, easy and transparent. Others think of them as mentors and personal advocates.
No one is born with the ability to lead. We are not given sprinkles of leader ability. The truth is that everyone has the opportunity to learn and develop into a leader. Along the way we learn, stretch and grow into leadership in small ways.
Leadership as a slippery slope no matter what position or situation you find yourself in. We can sabotage our own good intentions as these actions appear normal to us.
What does the slippery slope look along our way to wiping strong leadership and replacing it with self inflicting sabotage.
- We become more of a friend with the people we lead then a leader. Whoops, we fall when we need to deliver bad news as to not hurt the “friendship”. We want to be liked more than lead.
- Being extremely empathetic. This looks like “I feel your pain!’” when being told that another can’t come into work or do this or that for various reasons. Leaders need to care but not to the point that someone takes advantage of their empathy… and it WILL happen.
- Refusing to be the role model that we want others to emulate. You were chosen as a leader so step up and show the world what that looks like. Others will rise or fall to that expectation. Raise others up not push them down with your role as a leader.
- Telling others that we do not agree with a management decision and why. Although we might not always agree with decision, we can position it so that our “opinion” is kept out of the mix. If you don’t buy in to it, then they won’t either.
Leave your ski’s at home and take the safe way down. Leading others in business, family or personal can be a rewarding and growing experience.
May 19th, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, Uncategorized, attitude, intellectual | | 0 Comments
(K)now The 5 Areas of Beautiful Strength
I walked into a national sporting goods store and saw a Nike tee shirt with the phase “Strong is the new beautiful”. Up until then, I never thought about beauty or health in that way. With so much media attention paid to an “image” of beauty, we sometimes lose focus on what beauty and strength can be in other life areas. This also apples to men as beauty and health are gaining a greater focus on their side of the fence.
I stopped to think about if I was developing strength in the five areas of strategic wellness: physical, emotional, intellectual, social and occupational. Where is my strength in each area? Am I working towards strength? If not, let’s get to the big WHY?
- Are my muscles strong to lift and bend? Are they lean and flexible? Can I stretch and just plain move?
- Have I dusted out the cobwebs of any emotional issues or pain and begin to heal the past hurts?
- Am I doing enough to educate myself by attending free webinar’s, reading, blogging, joining online user groups for support and inspiration and attending professional development classes?
- Then there’s the social aspect with community, friends and family. Have I been reaching out, going out and or just plain being out? With the busyness of the past few months, we tend to hunker in for the long winter.
- Finally, am I planning on reaching my full occupational potential? If yes, what plans do I have to increase my value as an employee and reach new heights in my career?
Our hearts desire can be strong. Each of us will ask our own strength questions to see how heart healthy we’ve become. Beauty follows with confidence, joy, youthful expression and a positive attitude of wealth and happiness.
Be healthy and fabulous!
Sandra
April 22nd, 2009 - Posted in ABC's, Uncategorized, attitude, emotional, health, intellectual, occupational, physical, social | | 0 Comments
(J)ustifying Our Measuring Stick
Where you ever in a conversation where you didn’t totally agree with someone. Your kinda looking at them sideways trying to understand their point of view but are not quite getting it. This happen to me recently. Jim was telling me how he “coached” a co-worker into looking at their own personal measuring stick to measure results.
Jim was approached by a co-worker, Kevin, and given a great compliment. Basically, that the job he was doing was “great” and that Kevin could never measure up to the work ethic or results of Jim on this particular project. Jim commented that we have our own personal measuring sticks on how we measure results. Kevin should use his own measuring stick to find his own “job well done”.
I agreed with Jim on using his own personal measuring stick. The first person we need to please is ourselves. That’s what produces our self confidence for the future. In contrast, our measuring stick is made up of many inches.
- Inch one -past personal and professional experiences
- Inch two -family upbringing
- Inch three -work ethic
- Inch four - failures in life and business
- Inch five - successes
- and … so on
But ….. what if …. our personal measuring stick is too low and we use this as a way to quit, avoid and not strive for success.
Joining my own thoughts to Jim’s would look like this.
We have our own personal measuring sticks on how we measure results. We should visualize a measuring stick that is much longer. Those inches should reflect a variety of expectations
- what is required to complete the job
- how my management team will measure me on a “job well done”
- how does this fit into my personal and professional development plan
- the areas of growth I need to be successful
- s-t-r-e-a-t-c-h-i-n-g and g-r-o-w-i-n-g even though it’s uncomfortable
When we stop striving we settle. Right now in history, we have tremendous opportunities. Regardless of the economy or our financial status, we can continue to stretch ourselves to prepare for a greater future. Our measuring stick should be growing by yards as our experiences and development increase. We are forging the inches on this stick to be even better for future opportunities.
Keep adding inches to your personal measuring stick. To stop striving is settling. Status quo may not always be the way to go.
Be healthy and fabulous!
Sandra
September 16th, 2008 - Posted in ABC's, Uncategorized, attitude, change, intellectual, occupational, performance, productivity | | 1 Comments
(I)ntentional Social Connections
Earlier this year, I reconnected with a high school classmate. I’m embarrass to say that I did not reach out to Dan first. He initiated the connection from a posting on a high school alumni website. Some of us start to sweat at the thought of “going back there” whether it’s through email, telephone or in person. There is something to be said about staying connected and reaching out to others from high school, college, former organizations and associations. It has it’s value when the time is right.
I’ve watched as Dan has reconnected me to not only him but others. After learning more about Dan, I discovered he is truly an “intentional connector”. An intentional connector is a person that makes it a point to keep in touch with people from their past, initiate new friendships in the present and connect people from both worlds for the future.
Just recently, I received an anonymous email from from my website contact page. It detailed how “Dan” told them about my website and to check it out. It turns out that Dan had given my information to a former classmate and connected the two of us if even for a brief moment.
Why is intentionally connecting people important?
- It allows others to see that you are interested in them for them.
- People find this type of reaching out as compassionate compared to the dog eat dog world we sometimes live in.
- Networking, whether in a social or business setting, just makes sense.
- Each person knows approximately 250-500 people. What if you can help another or someone can help you?
What’s in it for you?
- friendships
- business relationships
- good times
- no regrets
- clear conscious
- future job opportunities
- interesting projects
Prior to Dan and I reconnecting, I reached out a number of years ago to my best friend from high school. Was this scary? Yes. Would she reject me? Possibly. I am happy to say that we established our relationship for the following three years. Suddenly, on a May Sunday, she died. I’m blessed to have reconnected with her. I live knowing I have no regrets about about the “what ifs”.
Let’s look at being an intentional connector from a business aspect. Being the connector in business can enchance your career. Here’s how …
- You become the “go to” person.
- You’re seen as friendly, likeable and easy to work with.
- It creates positive energy that people want and need to be around in business.
- You the one who knows “a heck of alot of people”.
- You establish a huge network for yourself and your organization.
Go on! Try it! It’s not as scary as you think. Quite frankly, what’s the worst that can happen. I like to say if it’s not detrimental to your career, finances or family …. go for it!
Be healthy and fabulous!
Sandra
September 10th, 2008 - Posted in ABC's, social | | 0 Comments
(H)abits - The Good, the Bad and the Better
Did you ever say or hear someone say “Hey, that’s just a habit I have.” Normally this is an excuse for our behavior that someone noticed and pitched a hissy fit. Otherwise, we probably would have gotten away with it because it goes un-noticed by us. Each of us determines our own habits. Yet other people use their own measuring stick to “call us out”.
If we look at it from the flip side, habits can also be positive and can dramatically impact our health and well being. They also affect how other people see us which leads them into a our healthy behaviors.
For example,
- brushing and flossing our teeth before we go to bed
- eating 5 fruits and vegetables a day
- taking vitamins
- deliberately taking time to relax and/or meditate
- going to church
- cleaning up our desk at the end of the day
- planning a to-do list
- scheduling preventive screening appointments
- reading one book per month
- returning phone calls and answering emails
- exercising at least 3 times per week
- being on time
- going to the dentist twice a year
- drinking 6-8 glasses of water per day
- being positive and friendly
- balancing our checkbook
- paying our bills on time
- journaling
- taking a nap on the weekend
- getting to bed around the same time each night
If we incorporate one good habit each month, we would have changed 12 behaviors towards health and wellness in one year.
Action Plan
- Make a list of less than desirable habits and another list of habits you would like to adopt over the next 12 months. Use the list above to jog your memory.
- Rank the healthy habits in order.
- From your top 5 new habits, which ones can you move on quickly and which require other people, resources or sometimes money.
- Begin and chart your progress on a blank calendar.
- At the end of the first month, look at your progress and see how far you reached.
- Begin another healthy habit at month two.
The word “habit” gets a bad rap. When we combine the habit with something that is good FOR us then we are on the road to being
- healthy physically, emotionally, intellectually, socially, and occupationally
- a mentor and role model for others to start and succeed at change
- positive and energetic
- someone that everyone WANTS to be around
Be healthy and fabulous!
Sandra
September 4th, 2008 - Posted in ABC's, change, habits, health, intellectual, occupational, physical | | 0 Comments
(G)et and Keep Your Business Etiquette
I must have been living in a hole over the last few years. In the last 6 months I’ve noticed that business etiquette is a thing of the past. Not only that, it’s getting worse by the day. I’m talking about the common courtesy of doing business in a professional manner. This type of behavior is becoming acceptable and the “way to do business”. I think it’s getting out of control.
So what does less than stellar business etiquette look like. Let’s break it down to the deliverer and the receiver.
From the person who delivers it ….
- not returning phone calls because you deem the matter unimportant <or> don’t want to talk to the caller
- not answering emails because you don’t have time
- deciding not to respond to an invitation because they will “figure it out”
- forgetting to act on what you said you were going to do
- over promising but under delivering <or> not delivering at all
- scheduling people for meetings even though you see their calendar is blocked off for that time
- being late for meetings
- having speaker phone conference calls at your cubicle when there are people working in theirs
- hijacking peoples time
- being dishonest with a business partner by making yourself look “bigger than life”
- intentionally refusing to end a business relationship when the common goal is no longer valid
- scheduling meetings then canceling that day
To the person who is the receiver it appears …
- myself and my business are not important enough for you
- you have poor time management skills
- your ego is bigger than our relationship can handle
- lack of trust for future projects, promotions or referrals
- lack of respect for my valuable time and money
- weak leadership ability
- your not as great as you think you are so get over it
- I won’t work with you because I’m not putting up with this behavior
- NEXT! I can find another person to do business with, give referrals to or promote within the company
- this is a small part of the behavior of your entire organization including the leadership team
- this behavior is intentional!
What you will hear are excuses like lack of time and lack of resources. We need to S-L-O-W down, take a deep breath and realize that this type of professional behavior molds our business reputation for our entire career. Not only that, it follows us around the globe. I’ve had this happen to me. I use to work with a man who was a cross line associate in an organization on the east coast. Fast forward many years later, 500 miles, a different company and he became my BOSS. Take a peak at a short video presentation on this story http://sandralarkin.com/BizEtiquette.htm.
Let’s get back to putting people and business relationships as a semi top priority. For some of us, we can kick it up a few notches and make a huge difference in our careers. For others, one notch may be just too much to handle. Remember, its your career for the long haul and your designing it with all your cumulative actions.
Be healthy and fabulous!
Sandra
June 5th, 2008 - Posted in ABC's, attitude, business etiquette, intellectual, occupational | | 0 Comments
